LIVE UNITED Y’All!

By Kerri Cokeley

This past January, my Grandmammy passed away. This was a hard time for me. I had spent the previous ten years helping care for her, and though her health was not the best, her death was quite sudden. As I sat at the funeral home preparing the arrangements the following day, I realized that I was so thankful that I had no regrets. I cared for her the best that I could, I learned as much as I could from her, and every time we saw each other we expressed our love for one another.

The feelings that have sunk in for me following her departure mostly relate to the recognition that I have lost all four of my blood grandparents. A whole generation is now gone from my family. Am I prepared to help fill this void?

Just as I finally start to come to the conclusion that, yes, I am ready and able to step up, I get hit with another blow. A text message came with the news that Helen, a second mother to me as a teenager, had passed away. How can this be? I’m just barely able to step up to the loss of my grandparents, I’m definitely not ready to start losing the next tier, my parents.

I expect that it will take a very long time for me to cope with and be ready to fill the void that will ultimately be left by the loss of the immediate next generation. However, it takes me to a new reflection. When I am gone, what will I have accomplished? I’ve thought about this many times before, but not in such a desperate, mortal kind of way.

Even several days later as I re-read Helen’s obituary, my eyes swell up at the third paragraph. Despite the unfortunate health situation that had plagued her for many years, she still found a way to make the world a little better than she found it. I hope that I can do the same. Don’t you?

Helen Frances Graber

POSTED: August 18, 2009

Helen Frances Graber, 49, of Matlacha, FL died at her residence on Aug. 14, 2009 after battling 20 years of illness and pain.

She was born to William G. and Kathleen F. (Preston) Graber on Feb. 2, 1960 in Louisville, KY. Helen moved to Matlacha in 2003 to be close to her only child and her grandchildren.

She was formerly from Clarksville, IN. where she spent many years working as an LPN caring for others. Her caring did not stop with her work, she was known for her open heart and open door policy. Many times she provided a needed refuge for countless teenagers that had nowhere else to go and no one else that cared. She made sure all had a warm place to stay, food to eat and most of all someone who cared.

She is survived by her daughter, Michelle Lynne Scalf, son-in-law, Stephen S. Scalf, grandchildren, Ashlynne Jade Scalf and Stephen Sebastian Scalf, of Bokellia. Other survivors include brothers, Norman D. Graber of Tuscon, AZ. and George P. Graber of Matlacha and a sister, Patricia L. Murphy also of Matlacha. She was preceded in death by both parents and a brother, Billy (Apple) Graber who died in 1979.

General Change the World, community service, future, making a difference

by Howard Mason

The television announcer called it “an impossible result.” None of the experts picked Mine That Bird to be anywhere near the finish. My brother-in-law, who considers himself a handicapper, started the process of making his pick by throwing this horse out of consideration.

On Sunday, he was saying that after-the-race examination of blood lines reveals hints of the possibility. But he still would not have picked this horse, he admitted. And Sunday afternoon Derby handicapping is in the same category as Monday morning quarterbacking.

Mine That Bird’s phenomenal finish in the Derby reminds us that our world is full of the possibility of the totally unexpected happening. And when those discontinuities, those totally unexpected events happen, they have a tendency to shake things to the foundation.

It seems those events are coming with greater frequency: the dot.com bubble implosion, September 11, 2001, tornadoes, tidal waves and hurricanes in the wrong times and places, the sub prime meltdown that left the whole world in deep recession, the current outbreak of a new strain of flu.

All of these events would not have happened if events complied with the projections we make based on tend lines from the past and present. The term Black Swan is used to describe a large-impact, hard-to-predict, and rare event beyond the realm of normal expectations. Nassim Nicholas Taleb in his 2007 book The Black Swan says these events are a special category of outliers—they don’t fit and cannot be predicted by the normal data sets.

The term Black Swan comes from the assumption that ‘All swans are white.’ So a black swan was a metaphor for something that could not exist. The 18th Century discovery of black swans in Western Australia changed the term to mean that the impossible actually happens.

Not all Black Swans are bad. The personal computer, the Internet, advances in antibiotics and antipsychotic medicines have all been Black Swans.

Here’s an example that has been on my mind:

If we predict the opportunities and needs of the Baby Boomers in the next three decades by extending current trends, considering demographics the primary variable or modeling on previous generations, we stand to miss by a substantial amount on one side or the other of where conditions may land. In twenty years, it is possible that there are cures for cancer and dementia. That alone would change aging as we know it.

Mary C. Bateson (daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson) and others see an explosion of generativity, where aging boomers become a growing asset rather than a growing liability in society. On the other hand, war, famine and plague brought on by the effects of climate change may limit the possibility of anything but the darkest future.

I am an optimist and would bet that opportunities are going to be in mobilizing and supporting the increasingly more generative, contributing and mobile group of seniors as they (we) age in ways no generation before us has.

If we ask about the role of technology, Ray Kurzweil’s prediction is most intriguing. “Before the century is even half over, you can be around for the Singularity, that revolutionary transition when humans and/or machines start evolving into immortal beings with ever-improving software.” Most of us don’t think in terms that include such massive disruption and discontinuity. Yet those are exactly the events and forces that will create the futures we or our children will inhabit.

So we need to get used to the idea that past performance does not predict the future. We need to not be too sure our data will be that good at picking the winner.

And prepare to be surprised.

General, Health, Volunteering Black Swan, future, Unpredictable events

Over the past few months my friends seem to ask me more and more how this organization can survive in this economy or whether there is any way that we can continue to provide many of our services to the community. To the surprise of my more pessimistic friends, typically my response is not the gloom and doom response that most expect in the current climate. People who do not work in non-profits or who do not work in the human and social services sector often times don’t understand. Of course we will survive, we don’t have any other choice.

While I would never dream of denying the challenges that our organization is going to face in the very near future, I am excited and invigorated by those same challenges. In order for any organization to survive, non-profit or otherwise, it must be flexible, willing to grow, and show an aptitude for innovation.  These are all qualities that Metro United Way has shown even in times of flourishing economies. Yes, we could sit back and say there is no way that we can continue to do what we do in the present climate, but I personally feel that would be the easy way out and completely irresponsible. It is my belief that in times of great challenge there is also great opportunity for those who are willing to seize it. This great community that we live in, I believe, is one of the most empathetic and caring in the nation, and now more than ever those “less fortunate” in our community need us — all of us. Now is our time to shine!

This year United Ways across the United States have adopted a new call to action, Live United. How does one Live United you may ask? Well, by Giving, Advocating, and Volunteering.

Give! We are in the home stretch of closing our 2008 Campaign, and our goal is within sight, but we still need your help. If you are able and would like to give please contact a Donor Relations staff member by calling the Metro United Way offices at (502) 583-2821 or going to our website.

Advocate! Tell others how you Live United and what you do to support the caring power of our community.

Volunteer! Share your time and talents with those who truly are in need. Again please visit our website for a list of possible volunteer opportunities.

And remember, “Together we are bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions.” (President Barack Obama)

Advocacy, Events, Giving, Volunteering Community, Economy, future, Live United, opportunity