The Art of Balancing…
When I first started with Metro United Way almost seven years ago, I staffed what was then the Success By 6 Child Care Action Team. This team had developed several strategies about how to support child care providers in their efforts to provide high quality child care for young children and how to ensure that working families had access to affordable high quality child care.
One of the strategies that this team chose to focus on was the promotion of Work/Life Balance and the recognition of companies that offered their employees family-friendly policies. This seemed like a good idea to me. I was on board with this strategy. I thought that it was important. However, it wasn’t until after I had my own child that I realized just how hard it is to balance all the work life stuff, and I work at one of those places that is pretty supportive of me in my role as a parent.
I’ve talked to lots of my girlfriends about this and it seems to ring true for every single mom that I know that works outside of the home. The basic problem is that you never feel like you can give enough to anything that you do.
I constantly feel guilty that I am not giving enough of myself to my son, my husband, my job, my friends, my family or myself. I worry that the time that I spend with Luke during the week is too limited and that the hours that I am home are spent preparing dinner, getting him bathed and into bed at a reasonable time. Sure, there is some time in there for us to play, read and snuggle, but it doesn’t really seem like enough time to devote to the most important thing in my life!
I also fret that I don’t give enough of myself to my work. (Trust me when I say that my husband clearly disagrees with me on this.) I think I have a really important job. It is a big goal to ensure that all of the children in our community are healthy, safe, nurtured and prepared to succeed in school. Sometimes I think that having a person in my position who could work a sixty hour work week is what is needed to actually achieve that goal.
And then there are all of the other important life factors that seem not to get the attention that they deserve: my husband (sorry honey!), my friends, my family, and not to be selfish but ME!
And here’s the thing: I know that I have it good. I am lucky to work for an organization that values its employees and their families. When I was breastfeeding, I had an office that I could comfortably close the door and pump milk for my baby. I have fantastic co-workers who I can call upon when Luke is sick and they will cover for me. I have the flexibility to schedule Parent/Teacher conferences at Luke’s school during the workday when his teachers are available. I have volunteer hours that I can choose to use by spending time at my son’s school helping out in the classroom or on Board projects.
I am grateful for the technology that is available to me so that I can check e-mail and work on electronic files from home.
I once heard a speaker refer to a study about Generation X parents like me. We don’t want to miss our kids’ soccer games or school events. So, although we may slip out of the office early for that kind of thing, we make up for it by checking e-mail or doing work after our kids are in bed. Hey, if nothing else, we recognize and strive for a Work/Life Balance in a way that many of our Baby Boomer parents couldn’t.
How’s your balance working out?
Photo Credit: James Jordan